The weekend of September 22, 1979,
seems so long ago.
It seems like yesterday.
My heart skipped a beat when we met at 1618 Beacon Street.
Throwing the football along the Charles.
Dinner at Legal Seafood.
Such great memories.
He was not like anyone I had ever met.
He was working nights and weekends,
in addition to his real job.
He did this to help his brother build a home.
We were young.
We were single.
And yet this man was sacrificing that single life.
He did it for his family.
I was in awe.
Fast forward, and two years later we were married.
Kathleen's mom once said to a bunch of us,
"You will meet a lot of men in your life.
Be sure to choose the one you know you want to grow old with."
I did that.
He was my best friend.
I learned from him.
and I think he learned from me.
We depended on each other.
We carried each other.
We were a team.
We were better as two than we were as one.
Oh, please don't misunderstand.
He drove me crazy.
He organized everything.
I believe the refrigerator was alphabetized.
But equally, I drove him crazy.
I am pretty sure that's what marriage really is.
Then, Alexandra and Graham were born,
and there was new purpose.
This was our family.
His organized, workaholic nature was for a reason.
He lived for us.
He would melt as he came into the driveway
and the kids would run into his arms.
He made a wagon ride, on the back of his lawnmower
the most exciting thing in the world.
Rides in the bucket truck topped everything.
He helped coach soccer,
even though he didn't know a thing about it.
He built sets for ballet.
He dug the biggest holes on Baker's beach
and built the most amazing castles…
He was there.
Before he was diagnosed with Frontotemporal Degeneration,
Kenny planned a surprise 50th birthday party for me.
I hate surprise parties….
He did it over the course of a year.
It was amazing.
The people he invited,
including the details he knew would be important to me,
omitting the things he knew I wouldn't care about.
These were done to perfection.
It was a beautiful evening.
His final birthday gift to me was on my 56th birthday.
My best friend,
my team mate,
my husband gave me
the gift of knowing that he no longer suffered.
He is finally at peace.
I no longer have to worry.
This is truly a gift of love.
17 comments:
Beautiful. Thank you for posting.
He was one in a million and I am happy to read of your wonderful life together. May he rest in peace
Helen xx
We are all better people for knowing Kenny! Thanks for sharing
so proud of you.
I love you.
An arresting and compelling testament full of heart and feeling and lasting connection of thelife-changing love that will never leave you. You're a pillar of openness and strength and grace and everyone in your family should feel proud of the lives you built and touched all around you. God Bless and Godspeed in the long life ahead of you Cheryl.
What a beautiful tribute. You are in my prayers and your children also.
There are no words - just know that I'm thinking of you and your family at this saddest of times. Leigh
Cheyl, I send my heartfelt condolences. This is absolutely one of the most beautiful tributes I have ever read. Kenny is resting in peace now and there is no doubt that he will watch over you as he did when he was here over you and your family. He sounds like an incredible man, father, husband and friend. One in a million. How lucky for you that you got to spend the time that you did with him, and that you have two beautiful children as a celebation of your love.
How lucky for him that he had you to care for him so unconditionally when he was both healty and sick. I send you a great big hug and will be keeping you in my prayers.
My big sister is an extraordinary woman. What for most would have been a prison sentence, became for Cheryl a grace-filled journey into her own empowerment & liberation.
Touching. I feel the love shared was full of hello's, open arms, strength and grace. We attended our neighbor's Mother's funeral last week. Gram was 104 and we were all so delighted to know she was now in the best place. I think no matter the age, saying Goodbye is never easy. You have done this so eloquently.
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Cheryl, I am so so so very sorry for your loss. I am sitting in Sbux w tears running down my cheeks... I too am starting a new chapter... In some ways the same in many ways different. I wish I had what you had. You are so very very lucky. This summer was crazy but next time I am in RI we WILL get together xoxo
Hello Cheryl:
What a beautiful tribute this is to the man who was your soul mate, your best friend, your everything.
We believe that Kenny is in a better place and are sure that, in time, you will be able to focus on all the many,many positive impacts Kenny made in your family life, in your friendships and in your acquaintances.
Recent times have been incredibly difficult for you both and now for you as you face the future without Kenny. Take good care of yourself and we are sure that you will be able to take strength from the support of your wonderful family.
Our thoughts and prayers are with you.
Hi Cheryl, Believe it or not these are very special times your in after loosing a loved one. We all leave some kind of residue after being with someone . . . this is Kenny's. By reading your comments, he lived for you and the kids, he made some beautiful memories with a sense of humor. Family was everything to him. After my husband passed, I really realized how honored and blessed I was to be married to such a person. Not everyone is as blessed to be married to someone with such a good heart and dedication to his family. Kenny with live within you . . . live strong for him and what he represented. Blessings, Sandy:O)
What a moving tribute to your husband. I have been reading your blog for a few months now and love your beautiful photography and beautiful thoughts. I am so very sorry for your loss. God is with you. You will see Kenny again. "May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit." Romans 15:13.
Hello Cheryl,
I started my morning by reading your posts and I keep coming back...but there are no words...this is so beautiful. It took me several times of looking at your photos to realize the gorgeous photography of the flowers are those that surround you now at home just like the the love of your children and the wonderful memories. Peace.
xo annie
Cheryl, I didn't realize this had happened. I wonder how you're doing now - wonder if you will even see this comment because I'm leaving it months after the fact. But please know that I care.
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